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Why do some women think they deserve domestic violence?
A study carried out by Hacettepe University's Institute of Population Studies in Ankara has revealed that one out of every four women in Turkey think their husbands have at least one just reason for treating them violently. The survey, which is carried out every five years, was conducted among 7,405 married women whose ages ranged between 15 and 49. Around 25 percent of survey respondents said they could find at least one reason to justify their husbands resorting to violence.
This legitimization of domestic violence is a natural result of living in a patriarchal society, said Hülya Gülbahar, chairwoman of the Association for Education and Supporting Women Candidates (KA-DER).
She said starting from their birth, women are conditioned and taught that they were born to serve men -- their husbands -- and obey their orders. “So, when they act outside these ‘norms,' they immediately think that their actions justified violence,” Gülbahar told Sunday's Zaman.
According to the survey, acts such as “wasting money” and “neglecting children's care” are for some women acceptable reasons for their husbands to resort to violence. Although the number of women in Turkey who fail to oppose domestic violence no matter what its reason, cannot be ignored, the founder of the women's rights group Flying Broom (Uçan Süpürge), Halime Güner, applauds the fact that there has been a decrease in the number of women legitimizing their husbands' violence as compared to the previous survey by the same institution, conducted in 2003.
According to the 2003 survey, the number of women who blame themselves for domestic violence was around 39 percent. This view was especially widespread among uneducated women who live in rural areas. Güner explained the situation of these women as “learned helplessness.” This is a condition in which a person has learned to behave helplessly, even when the opportunity to help themselves by avoiding the unpleasant or harmful circumstances to which they have been subjected is available to them.
For generations, when they marry, women have been told, “You enter this house in a white wedding dress, you can only get out of this house [leave your husband] when you are in white cerecloth [i.e., dead],” said Güner, noting that women have increasingly begun to discover that “they do not have to get off the bus at the final stop.” Regarding the rising number of women who reject all excuses for violence, she said women have learned to resist their husbands' violence thanks to other women and women's rights organizations.
What needs to be done to increase awareness regarding domestic violence?
According to Gülbahar, a change of mentality is needed in the state to ensure that women reject violence no matter what excuse is given for it. She also suggested that the state needs to produce policies to counter violence and discrimination against women.
“I don't think that such a change in mentality will take place soon,” said Gülbahar.
Women can learn to oppose violence through other women and thanks to women's organizations, Güner said. She believes that a change of mentality among women can take place when they hear of other women's experiences. “Women know each other; they know how they live. So, it is only possible for those who have undergone a change to change others,” remarked Güner, stressing that trying to raise women's awareness of rejecting violence only through laws would not be very helpful.
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