Parent of a child with special needs

Often Turks seem to observe that foreign kids are sent to international private schools where children may only enroll if they hold a foreign passport. Although these schools range in price, they are usually the most expensive ones.

Not every foreigner who lives in Turkey is someone who basically thinks that if you keep out of my life, I’ll keep out of yours and is somebody who feels no obligation to integrate into the host culture’s way of life.

Many foreign parents would like for their children to make friends with local children and learn about the host culture, but their primary concern has to be about the quality of education that their children receive. They want to be sure that their children can go back to their homeland and not be different from their peers at university.

For one reason or another, not every child adjusts to other cultures. Mom and dad have expressed concerns that when they moved as a family overseas they wanted to encourage their children to get involved in extracurricular activities such as sports and music. They also say it is important that they talk with their children at the end of each day and recognize that parental involvement with the school is essential. Parents who have children with special learning disabilities face an even greater challenge:

Here is a letter from one parent who requests to remain anonymous:

Dear Charlotte: We have a daughter in year 5 at a private school. She suffers from a learning disability -- dyslexia. Before we knew it was this, we were told by the school that our child should be held back in school and placed into a class with students a few years younger, which would help her do better. There was concern for her low self-esteem and low self-confidence. We were aware of these traits because we had read that this can be a symptom of dyslexic children. We did not feel comfortable with the school’s recommendation that our child, age 9, should be in a class with children that young. We refused.

Because private schools are not just an educational institution but also have to operate as a business, we believe that the lack of feedback on our child’s performance in her earlier years has now created a worse problem for us to deal with. We have paid the school a fortune. We are disappointed that we have not been given more advice and support. We can’t help but think that they were more concerned in keeping us as their customer than risk telling us something that we may have not wanted to hear. The scary thing is that if sufficient help is not available in private schools I cringe to think what happens to children in government schools who have special needs.

We have taken our child out of the school and are now homeschooling her.

Dear Anonymous: You are very courageous. Many schools may have a speech and linguist specialist on staff, but most schools are not equipped to offer a diagnosis of dyslexia as this should be done by a certified professional. Although it seems that usually Turkey is later than others in forming specific organizations to support and help in special cases, in this case, you will be glad to know that there is an organization in Turkey based in Lefkosa, called North Cyprus Dyslexia Association and approved by the United Nations Development Programme (UNDP), who are determined to help teachers and parents better understand dyslexia.

There are many Web sites to help parents learn more about dyslexia. I was impressed with one that provides a good definition of the learning disability and spells it out by age groups. You can visit it at: http://www.psychnet-uk.com/dsm_iv/dyslexia.htm

“Anyone can give up, it’s the easiest thing in the world to do. But to hold it together when everyone else would understand if you fell apart, that’s true strength.” -- Christopher Reeves