In the past few weeks, the stream of violent incidents reported in the media has been relentless. Barely a day has gone past without another young woman killed or attacked by a husband or a relative. In several cases, the authorities or the judiciary were found wanting.Since I have often mentioned these shortcomings in my articles, I felt it was only fair to highlight positive examples, which suggest that social perceptions are gradually changing and some judges reflect this evolution in their rulings.
The Radikal newspaper has just published the unprecedented verdict of an Ankara court in a divorce case that involved a young woman who, just before she married, had won a place at Bolu University. When her parents suggested that instead of pursuing her education, she should wed a relative living in France, she was reluctant. She only relented when the prospective husband promised he would make it possible for her to attend a university in France.
Once they were married, however, his attitude changed: Instead of sending her to a language course, he demanded that she limit her activities to household chores. He forbade her from leaving the house on her own and, at times, used force as a means of persuasion.
Eventually, the young woman returned to Turkey and sought to have the marriage dissolved. The judge not only granted her request for divorce, but ruled that by preventing her from developing her potential and integrating in the host society, the husband was guilty of “social violence” and should pay her TL 30,000.
Recently, a female judge in Kastamonu imposed an unusual punishment on a husband who had beaten his wife and locked her in the house. The accused was told to make a written public apology to his wife and to the population of Araç district and to distribute 1,000 copies in the community. He was also asked to plant 50 saplings. In case his public shaming proved not enough of a lesson, the judge warned the violent husband that he was on probation for five years and would go to jail if he re-offended.
But it will take more than a few exemplary rulings to stem the tide of family violence, as the latest incident reported in Van province shows.
A 25-year-old man strangled his 17-year-old wife, Makbule Yarka, because he “found marriage difficult.” The two were only married in front of an imam. In court, the young man admitted his wife had done nothing wrong. He mentioned a lack of money, which seems to be a frequent background to cases of abuse, perhaps because men, expected to be providers, feel inadequate when they cannot fulfill their responsibilities and take out their frustrations on those closest to them.
In this particular instance, the police had intervened after an episode of domestic violence and had taken the young woman back to her parents. Her father kept her for 10 days before sending her back to the marital home, where according to tradition, she belonged.
Radikal published a wedding photo of the young couple: The bride looked utterly miserable; the groom had a long face. It was obvious that neither of them were thrilled to be getting married. No doubt their families thought they were doing the right thing when they convinced them to get married. They presumably hoped that the young couple would eventually accept their fate and settle down. How many more young lives have to be destroyed before families and the community around them realize that “the road to hell is paved with good intentions”?
