Usually each member of a family has some differences from the others. Over the years the differences grow. Let’s just consider my family for a moment: we are very different, and our differences have grown with the passage of the years. Since I have lived overseas for many years, it is hard to keep an ongoing relationship with nieces and nephews, brothers and sisters. When I visit my hometown in America, it is never for very long. It seems that every time I see my relatives we have to get reacquainted.
I wonder if many of you feel like I do: Having lived overseas for so long I feel very different from my brothers and sisters who have lived their entire lives in their homeland.
It is funny though how certain things can almost bring us back to the point of how we used to be when we were growing up -- when there was not so much distance. I’d like to call those memorable times “golden moments.” One of the occasional exceptions to this distancing that I can remember is whenever we attend a baseball game together.
For you it maybe some other sport or activity…
Baseball, popcorn, hot dogs and pop galore -- what fun! Although the Houston Astros were our favorite team, any baseball team and game can work the magic and bring back the childhood bond.
I remember once when we were sitting in seats along the first base line and one of the players hit a foul bowl. My brother jumped up and ran over and caught the ball. We were all proud of him. He got to keep it as a souvenir.
Another time two of my brothers, dressed in their Chevrolet baseball uniforms, were playing that night. The other team was up to bat. It was the fifth inning. John was in the outfield and Jamie was pitching. The ball was pitched and the batter hit the ball. It look like it would be a home run but John ran right back to the end of the field and jumped up and caught the ball. The batter had only made it to third base. Well done John! All the Chevrolet fans shouted.
When we went to games we were living. We were happy and just having fun.
We relaxed and enjoyed the game and each other; it was almost like heaven.
We can all think of other moments of joy and happiness:
* Graduation
* Winning a contest or race
* Accepting a marriage proposal
* Giving birth and holding your baby in your arms
* Getting your first “real” job
* Getting to know your niece who says, “I love you, Aunt Tarlot”
* Hearing you grandchildren say, “I love talking with you, Granny”
When T.S. Eliot asked, “Where is the Life we have lost in living?” I am certain he had more grand notions in mind when he wrote those contrasting words, Life and living. But for me and my family those days spent at the baseball park fell into the living category.
Different cultures and different religions have their own ideas about heaven. I think these experiences fall not only in the living category; they are a glimpse of heaven. Some believe that heaven is a place with mansions and streets of gold. But I’m happy when I have the kind of gladness that comes from going to the ballgame with your family, and from being with a niece who loves you.
Tolstoy is very popular in both English and Turkish. In his “War and Peace,” he addresses the issue of life and living by writing, “It is only unself-conscious activity that bears fruit, and the man who plays a part in a historical drama never understands its true significance.”
A contemporary author, Gordon MacDonald, interprets Tolstoy’s quote as meaning: Get your mind off yourself, do the right thing and let the rewards take care of themselves.
Enjoy your life and family: LIVE.
Note: Keep your questions and observations coming: I want to ensure this column is a help to you, Today’s Zaman’s readers. Email: c.mcpherson@todayszaman.com
